Anger can be our worst subject.  We show too much.  We show too little.  We point it in the wrong direction.

In my family, it was important to shield the children from anything resembling anger.  My parents thought if we didn’t see it, the kids wouldn’t know it was there.  So while there were no bold expressions of rage between them, we became very adept at reading subtle body language.  Sometimes lack of eye contact, or tension in their face was the only clue that our parents were annoyed. 

For some families, it’s the opposite.  Anger is wild and open – all red-faced and raised voices.  People misunderstand each other; they misread intentions.  Communication goes bad.  The fights can blaze white-hot, explode, and then end in a long stony silence.

And outside of the home, or our personal friendships, so much material is specifically created to elicit an angry response.  We can feel that our anger is righteous, and that to act on that anger can seem like the only moral response.


 My God, whom I praise, do not remain silent,
     for people who are wicked and deceitful
     have opened their mouths against me;
     they have spoken against me with lying tongues.
With words of hatred they surround me;
     they attack me without cause.
In return for my friendship they accuse me,
     but I am a man of prayer.
They repay me evil for good,
     and hatred for my friendship.  Psalm 109:1-5 NIV


What to do with all of our anger?

We can take a cue from the “imprecatory psalms” –  those psalms which give a voice to fury and frustration.  Imprecatory psalms are a call out to God for justice. They give voice to what I want to do.  When I want to blow something up.  When I want to say what should never be said.  When I want to get in the last and most destructive final word. 

These psalms, these cries of anguish and rage, are included in the Bible, letting us know that God accepts — and even invites – our human emotion.  We can bring our furious anger, our resentment, our disappointment in other people, directly to Him.  He actually wants to hold them, in all of their raw intensity.  Why?

Because in giving voice to the fury in myself, I can understand better the fury in others.  Because in expressing my disappointment in others, it helps me see how I also let other people down.

Rather than acting on all these tender, inflamed feelings that risk creating permanent damage, these psalms show me that I can instead speak with deep honesty to my God about what it feels like. And I can also trust the outcome to His judgment.  Rather than harboring my own tunnel-sized view of my resentment, I can speak it to the One who knows me best. And I can relax my heart around it, rather than gripping onto the smoldering resentment.  In that way, I can be free.

This week, find some guilty pleasure in your favorite imprecatory psalm – maybe Psalms 7, 35, 59, 69, 109 or 137.  Feel the burn.  Next week, we will learn what to do with it.

by Carie Grant