Scripture teaches that God gives us good and perfect gifts (James 1:17), yet loss and grief are inevitably part of the human experience. How do we live in this world? 

I once attended a workshop where Kleenex, along with these instructions, was available::  “If someone is crying, don’t offer them a tissue. It can feel like we’re being told that we’ve been grieving long enough and that it’s time to get ourselves together. Let people process their emotions for as long as they need to .” I’ve thought a lot about that.  

While troubles and loss aren’t good, Scripture indicates that mourning is appropriate in some seasons:   

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:
 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance. Ecclesiastes 3:1, 4

It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of everyone; the living should take this to heart.   Ecclesiastes 7:2  


We can experience God’s care when our hearts break. God pays close attention to our lives and promises His comfort:

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Matthew 5:4


In turn, we are to  mourn with others. We’ll be able to comfort them as we have been comforted:

Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Romans 12:15

[He] comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.
2 Corinthians 1:4


God gives us the space and time to experience our grief.  We don’t have to be ”proper” in sorrow and the process needs time.  There’s a natural instinct to put boundaries around sorrowing, as if that would make loss more tolerable. We need  the freedom to intensely express grief and anger.  God created us with emotions, He acknowledges our sorrow, knows our frailty, and has compassion on us. 

Grief and the experiences that cause it aren’t good in themselves and they won’t exist in the  new creation: 

“…‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Revelation 21:4


In the meantime, we will experience brokenness and sorrow.  It can be difficult to imagine that grief can produce anything of value, but it can become a blessing in God’s hands.  Looking back on my life, I can see how God was faithful in seemingly hopeless situations and I’m less afraid than I used to be.

You turned my wailing into dancing;
    you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy,
   that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent.
LORD my God, I will praise you forever. Psalm 30:11-12


The song Muddy Water by Sierra Hull is very beautiful! Some, not all, of the  lyrics fit this topic:

“Way down deep, where the honesty grows,
is the part that we try to keep as our own.
I wish that you would show me who you are when you let it all go.
I will never leave you standing alone in muddy water.

Standing at the bottom and you can’t seem to swim to the top.
Can’t see the hand reaching out there to you in the dark…
So look for the light cause you know it’s the only way out…
I will never leave you standing alone in the muddy water.

 

Sierra Hull – “Muddy Water” (Official Video)


by Sherry Sommer


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